Over and Over

I am essentially choosing to be with someone who doesn’t choose me.

Every day decisions are made and I am not it.

Where the thought of how I would feel doesn’t register or at least doesn’t change the course of the decision.

Every day I am reminded, I am no longer a priority.

Ignored and dismissed, feeling small and invisible.

I reach out and sometime lash out in order to get attention, even of the negative kind.

I ask myself why do this to myself over and over again….

June 2019- R1