Merci, Rekeisha

I’ll hold my hand up, for the past 3-4 years, I have been doing a lot of soul searching, replaying moments in my mind where I could have done better, moments where I should have acted differently. Times when I should have made better choices, I can definitely say that I have made choices that I am not proud of, on a bad day I may even say that I regret them. Needless to say, for a long time I blamed myself for all of the things that went wrong in my life, I took responsibility for everyone’s wrong doing towards me and felt that in some way I ultimately deserved all of it. At my lowest I fully believed maybe I was a hard person to love; too aggressive, too opinionated, too independent, too much. Recently, I came across an article about healing and it stated that we should thank our past selves for the journey that brought us to where we are now. So, I decided I was going to step into my truth and thank myself, thank Rekeisha for what brought me to where I am. Here goes…

Healing doesn’t mean the damage no longer existed. It means the damage no longer controls our lives.

– Unknown

Dear Rekeisha,
This is a thank you letter to you,
This is a love letter of sorts,
In the moments when you feel down
And feel you may be struggling,
I would like to take the opportunity to thank you,
Thank you for taking the risk,
Thank you for stepping out of the shadows,
Thank you for choosing bravery,
Thank you for choosing yourself and your happiness,
Thank you for recognizing you can’t fix everything or everyone,
Thank you for stepping back and not making everything your problem to solve,
Thank you for acknowledging that the real work is an inside job
Thank you for seeing that you can’t help someone who cannot help themselves,
Thank you for speaking your truth,
Thank you for being strong for your little girl,
Thank you for setting an example for her,

Thank you for the lonely nights,
Thank you for the feelings of darkness that surrounded me,
Thank you for stepping into the light,
Thank you for choosing compassion,
Thank you for choosing you,
Thank you for ignoring the doubt,
Thank you for pushing aside what others would’ve thought,
Thank you for pursuing your needs,
Thank you for the pain you endured,
Thank you for the betrayals you experienced,
Thank you for the scars,
Thank you for unhinging your wings,
Thank you for finding your voice,
Thank you for stepping into your purpose.

love always,
Rekeisha