I Wish Someone Would Have Told Me Pt 2: Vulnerability

I was always shown the stoic, resilient, strong female, they are celebrated in our family (as they most definitely should be), but sometimes I wish I knew about their worries. Their fears, feelings of inadequacies, their challenges. Being pregnant with 16 children and birthing 11 healthy gives you some type of superhuman strength, but maybe…

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Moody

Struggling to balance my head and my heart, Feeling tired, overwhelmed and cooped up, Floating, suspended in my thoughts and feelings, Not sure if I’m going up or down, Knowing the feelings will disappear in time, But sinking deeper and deeper into them, Thinking thoughts normally not my own, Who is this negative person, I…

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The Body Series: Reclaiming My Body

I began this post back at the beginning of the summer, I wasn’t feeling very confident about myself, I had recently began the tedious task of “online” dating and struggling a little bit with my self-worth. It’s amazing how words will reenter your consciousness when you’re feeling down, things you never believed about yourself surface…

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You’ve Given Up…

We used to stay up all night talking about anything and everything,Dreams, wishes, fears and plans,The air filled with promise, anticipation and most of all…loveWe promised to love, support and never turn our backs,Mutual respect and admiration,Decisions deeply rooted in love and wanting us to WIN as a collective,Feelings of rejection and hurt pride,But time…

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Lonely

The feeling of loneliness has been sitting with me for so long, we have become companions, Its comforting warmth wraps around me every night, reminding me of the void I feel, Trying to navigate the array of new emotions I never thought I would be feeling, Loneliness engulfs me and let’s me know I am…

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Slow Down

Slow down, Take the time for what it is, A moment to reset, Readjust, Realign into yourself, Slow down, You can’t rush what is coming to you, Maybe the timing just isn’t right, Slow down, Life will open up when you stop moving enough to see it, Your purpose will show itself, Slow down, February…

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Easier

Distance, space and time away allows us to do one of two things, Realize how much more you miss someone or how little you needed them, I just didn’t think you would have made it so much easier, Feelings floating, memories surfacing and all the while your name on my tongue feels foreign, How smoothly…

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Motherhood: Letting Go

They don’t tell you that all in all, motherhood a series of letting gos. You carry another human being within you, do everything within your power to keep them inside, warm, safe and impenetrable. Little do you know that it is all out of your hands. Soon enough you’re being told they are to be…

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Opening

Opening up to the possibility that there is good in me, Maybe it wasn’t all my fault, Opening up to the possibility that I am worthy of happiness, Maybe I don’t set the bar too high, Opening up to the feelings which flood me, Maybe I am not overdramatic Opening up to the fact that…

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Navigating My Triggers

I am a runner. Nope, not the running shoes, heavy breathing and sweaty running runner. The I-no-longer-feel-happy-safe-settled-or-off running from relationships like a track and field athlete. Being home quarantined allows you time to do a lot of thinking. Some of that thinking may not be so good, but ultimately it allows you to take stock…

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